


The Secrets That We Keep

by celeste9



Series: Promise [29]
Category: Primeval
Genre: Action/Adventure, Americans, Companionable Snark, Hotels, Insecurity, M/M, Nightmares, Public Claiming, Public Display of Affection, Secret Relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-07-26
Updated: 2012-07-26
Packaged: 2017-11-10 19:10:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 9,065
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/469692
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/celeste9/pseuds/celeste9
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A trip to America to take care of an anomaly reveals some underlying tension.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Beta by fififolle.

“How long until we get there?”

Lester gave Becker a long-suffering look. “I’ve only gone over it about a hundred times; I suppose once more won’t kill me. The flight to Chicago is about eight hours and then to Champaign is another half hour, not including how long it takes us to board. I believe the drive from the airport to the school is about twenty minutes.”

“There, see? It didn’t kill you.” Becker pressed a quick kiss to Lester’s face.

“No, but you might,” Lester grumbled and turned away.

Becker bit his lip and fought the urge to laugh. Lester’s bad moods never failed to be amusing. He wasn’t sure exactly when that had happened but it was probably a sign he was too smitten for his own good. Still, he didn’t want to provoke Lester any further, not when they were stuck together on a flight for eight hours.

They were going to America on what Becker supposed would be called a business trip, though it certainly was unlike any sort of normal business trip. Specifically, they were heading to the University of Illinois to help with a recurring anomaly that had been causing the Americans no end of trouble. When Lester had briefed him, he had gone on for some time about international cooperation and then quite a bit of “showing the Americans how it’s done” but Becker had tuned him out after a while. All he really needed to know was they were going on a trip and he would probably be asked to shoot something at some point.

Becker was looking forward to it, actually. He had never been to America and while a university in the Midwest wouldn’t have been his first choice, he’d take what he could get. Especially considering he wasn’t the one paying for it. He could almost pretend he was going on holiday with his lover, if not for the looming prospect of actually having to work.

“Hey, Lester, if I get a glass of champagne, will the ARC pay for it? Necessary expenses or something?”

Oh, right. And except for Connor.

-

It was late afternoon by the time they reached Urbana-Champaign in their rental car. Lester had arranged for them to meet with school officials in the morning so they had an early dinner before checking into a hotel off-campus. The six hour time difference was rather jarring and Becker found himself wanting to just collapse into bed in spite of the lingering daylight.

Connor followed Lester and Becker into their room, dumping his luggage in the middle of the floor before flopping down onto the bed. He bounced up and down a couple of times and then lay on his back with his knees bent over the side and his arms folded behind his head. “Ooh, nice bed.”

Lester kicked his foot. “I think you’ll find that next door you have your very own bed. A bed that you can have all to yourself.”

“I’m only being friendly, Lester. This is the perfect opportunity for team bonding, don’t you think? The three of us together in a strange country…”

Lester kicked his foot again.

Connor huffed and sat up, leaning on his elbows. “Okay, okay, I can take a hint.” His expression turned sly. “I suppose you’d rather have some alone time with Becker in this big, comfy bed.” He hopped off the bed, hefting his bag and going over to the door. “Try and remember that I’m only in the next room, though, yeah? Not all of us are lucky enough to have our significant others along for this trip. Besides, there are some things I’d really rather not know about you.”

As Connor left, Becker went and wrapped his arms around Lester’s waist, dropping his forehead onto Lester’s shoulder. “That certainly didn’t kill the mood.”

“Oh, please. You’re always in the mood.”

“Hmm, good point, well made.”

Lester stepped away and Becker let his arms slide away. “I need to unpack,” Lester said as he went over to his garment bag.

“Yes, God forbid you get a wrinkle in one of your suits.”

“I shouldn’t think I need to make clear to you the importance of making a good impression.”

“You impress people effortlessly, dearest,” Becker said but he left Lester to it and started to unpack his own clothes. He liked to give Lester a hard time about his neatness but Lester knew as well as he did that Becker appreciated order nearly as much.

When his clothes were all put away, Lester brought a bag of toiletries into the bathroom.

“How’s the bathroom?” Becker called, following him.

“I’ve seen better,” Lester said, running a critical eye over the room.

Becker peered over his shoulder. Clean but small, with a shower but no tub. “Could be a lot worse.”

“I suppose.”

“Well,” Becker said and tugged his shirt off over his head. “I don’t know about you, but I’d like to have a shower. It will be more fun if you join me.”

Lester looked uncertainly at the shower. “It’s a bit small for both of us. I think we’d flood the room.”

Becker shrugged and stepped out of his underwear. That was definitely an exaggeration. “Your choice, sweetie.”

After another moment of hesitation, Lester gave in and started to unbuckle his belt.

In the end, they simply showered together, literally. Becker always appreciated Lester’s sure hands on him, even if there was nothing sexual about it.

They were both tired and feeling the jet lag, so it wasn’t long before they crawled into bed. Becker draped an arm over Lester’s waist and closed his eyes, falling asleep to the low hum of the TV.

-

As they drove through campus, Becker sat in the front seat and listened with amusement to Lester curse under his breath and mutter about everything from one-way streets to idiotic pedestrians to terrible American drivers. He had offered to drive himself but Lester had looked at Becker like he was crazy, so he had dropped it, even though he’d had a suspicion this is what would happen.

They were heading to the Public Safety Building for their meeting, which was located in the northern-most area of campus. Becker as of yet had failed to notice any sort of unity or symmetry within the university set-up - the architecture was diverse and varied, but it was still somehow pleasing. There was a fair abundance of trees and greenery that helped and the mish-mash of buildings was a little bit charming.

Their destination was a brick building with a large, arched entranceway. They followed the directory to the correct room, where they were met by a secretary. She ushered them right through the door behind her.

A small dark-skinned woman in perhaps her fifties stood up to greet them. “Good morning, gentlemen! I’m Patti Stern, the university’s Executive Director of Public Safety.”

Lester shook her outstretched hand. “James Lester. We spoke on the phone?”

“Yes, of course. It’s a pleasure to meet you in person. I hope you didn’t have any trouble getting here.”

“No, the trip went quite smoothly.” He gestured to Becker and Connor to come forward. “These are my colleagues, Captain Becker, our head of security, and Connor Temple, one of our scientists.”

Ms Stern had a firm handshake and a pleasant, if well-practiced, smile. “I can’t thank you enough for coming.”

“There’s no need to try,” Lester said, taking the offered seat. He had fallen into that effortlessly polite and charming manner of speaking that Becker was always impressed by. “I’ve explained to Captain Becker and Mr Temple most of what you told me on the phone, but if you don’t mind, I’d like to go over the situation.”

“Absolutely, that won’t be a problem. The… anomaly?” Ms Stern hesitated but continued at a small nod from Lester. “It’s been opening periodically in the middle of the soccer field. Every fifty hours, on the dot, and it stays open for nearly two hours. Luckily it’s the summer term so the campus isn’t nearly as busy as usual and the soccer stadium is a fair distance away from the heart of campus, but we’ve still had some unfortunate accidents.”

“But still no deaths?”

“No, no deaths as of yet, thank God. We were forced to cancel some of our summer athletic camps for safety reasons. We’ve blocked off the area as best we can and campus police have been working with animal handlers to contain any creatures that have come through.”

“Surely you’re not keeping them?” Becker said, unable to keep the wariness from his voice.

Ms Stern’s reassurance was immediate. “Of course not, no. We send them back through as quickly as we can. The ones that we’ve captured alive, anyway. We’ve tried not to harm them unless absolutely necessary, but…” She trailed off with a tiny, uncomfortable shrug of her shoulders.

Lester nodded. “Yes, I understand. When will the anomaly open next?”

“Tomorrow, one o’clock in the afternoon.”

“Connor, is that enough time for you to put something together to close it?”

Connor shrugged. “Honestly? I doubt it.”

“Anything you can do will be a help,” Ms Stern said as she called her assistant into the office. “Mr Lester, is it all right if Mr Temple gets to work straight away on the technical side of things?”

Lester waved a hand in acquiescence. “By all means, put him to work.”

“Well, then, Mr Temple, we have a lab set up for you and I’ve arranged a team of physicists and engineers to assist you. Please, whatever you need, don’t hesitate to ask.”

“Thanks,” Connor said and allowed himself to be led off by Ms Stern’s assistant. His steps had a small bounce to them and Becker knew he was going to love this, the opportunity to geek out with like-minded people.

Lester returned his focus to the matter at hand. “Ms Stern, please correct me if I’m wrong, but I believe you said the anomaly connects to the Oligocene?”

“Yes, that’s right. We sent a team of experts through to identify--”

“You let people go through the anomaly?” Becker interrupted.

“Well, yes. We thought it best to learn everything we could and...” Ms Stern stopped, seeming flustered. “Was that wrong? I did inform Mr Lester when we spoke that a team had been sent through.”

Becker’s gaze flew to Lester, aghast, but Lester was steadfastly looking away. “The anomalies are dangerous. You have no idea what can happen on the other end; no one should ever be allowed through except as a last resort, and even then...”

“I’m sorry, Captain. This is all quite new to us; you’ll have to forgive any errors in judgment.”

“I’m sure Captain Becker meant no offense,” Lester cut in smoothly before Becker could respond. “He takes his duties very seriously.”

She smiled carefully, looking relieved. “Of course. I understand.”

The voice of Ms Stern’s assistant rang out over the intercom. “Ms Stern, Lieutenant Schuster is here to see you.”

“Oh, send him in, thank you.”

The door opened and a tall, bulky man in a police uniform entered. “Good morning, Ms Stern.”

“Thank you for coming, Lieutenant. This is Lieutenant Martin Schuster of campus police. He’s been heading the anomaly containment team,” Ms Stern informed them. “Allow me to introduce James Lester and Captain Becker, of England’s Anomaly Research Centre.”

“Pleasure,” Schuster said as he shook their hands.

“I thought Lieutenant Schuster and Captain Becker might like to get better acquainted. I’m sure he can explain things much better than I can.”

“Splendid idea,” Lester agreed readily. “Captain, why don’t you retrieve the EMDs and show them to the lieutenant?” Lester met Becker’s eye. “Go on and play with your toys. I’ll meet you later.”

“Yes, sir,” Becker said, less successful at sounding deferential than he had wanted, judging by the look on the American’s face. While Becker was no longer officially British military, he could still make them look bad. He resolved to try harder.

Becker walked out of the room with Schuster at his side, heading for the car where he’d left the EMDs. Becker had been able to bring two in his luggage, thanks to Lester. He sometimes thought that the best thing about Lester was the way he always handled everything. It made Becker’s life a lot easier.

“Where do you serve?” Schuster asked.

“I work privately now, but I was Special Forces.”

He gave an approving nod. “Special Forces, eh? Tough bastards. I’m ex-Army myself.”

That was reassuring. It was good to know that if Becker was going to be saddled with a bunch of police officers, at least one of them was military.

“So tell me about this EMD thing your boss mentioned.”

“It’s an electro-muscular disruptor, works a bit like a taser on a larger scale.”

Schuster eyed him doubtfully as Becker led him to their rental car. “I think I’d rather have a gun.”

“I felt the same, believe me, but we’ve had great success with them. One of these can literally take out a fully-grown T. rex, as long as you hit it enough times.”

“A T. rex, really?” Schuster asked, begrudgingly impressed.

“Our team leader designed them.” Becker pulled an EMD out of the boot but left it in its case, thinking it probably wouldn’t be a good idea to take a weapon out into the open on a university campus, even if he did have permission to have it. “Is there somewhere we can go where I can show you how it works?”

“Sure, there’s a shooting range we can use. I can fill you in on what we’ve been doing on the way.”

“Sounds great,” Becker said. He didn’t have much to go on, but Schuster seemed competent enough so far. Becker hoped the rest of his team would be of the same mould.

-

Becker didn’t see Lester again until they met for dinner and a couple of drinks before heading back to the hotel. Lester was subdued in a way that telegraphed to Becker a high level of stress, so Becker was doing his best not to add to it, even if he was worried himself - and even if he was pissed off about Lester not telling him people had been through the anomaly. Becker was an amazing boyfriend sometimes, he thought.

Connor emerged long enough to phone Lester with an update, saying that they were making progress but slowly. Becker could tell Lester was frustrated, but he only calmly told Connor not to overwork himself, that if they couldn’t close the anomaly tomorrow they would simply have to contain it. Becker was grateful Connor couldn’t see the expression on Lester’s face as he said that.

There were so many things that could go wrong. The Americans expected them to be experts and Becker supposed they were, but it wasn’t nearly so cut and dry as that. No matter how many times he did this, there were still shouts that made Becker feel completely foolish. His biggest concern was his back-up.

Lieutenant Schuster was part of a tactical response team made up of a combination of officers from the university and surrounding towns that were trained for the more high-risk situations that could occur, hostage incidents, barricaded armed subjects, and the like. It made Becker feel slightly better about the whole thing but he was still nervous at the prospect of relying on police rather than military.

“Campus police,” he mumbled under his breath.

“What was that?” Lester asked, glancing at him.

“Nothing.”

“Complaining already, darling? We’ve only been here a day.” Though Lester spoke lightly, the strain on his face was obvious to Becker.

He wanted to stay quiet. He shouldn’t add to Lester’s problems but he was unable to keep himself from saying, “Oh, it’s just… If we get to that anomaly and anything comes through, you know what my back-up is going to be? Campus police. Campus police! How am I supposed to work with that?”

“You seemed to get along fine with the lieutenant today.”

“Well, sure, he seemed decent enough, but that’s completely different. That wasn’t during an incursion.” And he at least had a military background. Becker knew better than to expect it of everyone else.

“They’ve been dealing with the anomalies on their own for nearly two weeks. I think you’re selling them a bit short.”

Becker breathed out through his mouth. He probably was. But he still… “I don’t like it, that’s all. It isn’t what I’d choose.”

“I know but I’m afraid you’ll have to make do with what you’re given. We all will.”

“I hope it doesn’t end up biting us in the arse. The blood will be on our hands.”

There was weary sorrow in Lester’s voice when he spoke. “Isn’t it always?”

“Yes,” Becker said and stared at his hands. Always.

For a moment Lester was silent and then he added, almost tentatively, “If I may venture to be so bold, I believe I know what this is really about.”

“Do you?”

“You’re still upset about what Ms Stern told us.” It was a statement rather than a question.

Bugger. Lester always saw straight through him. “It doesn’t matter.”

“Clearly it matters to you, so it matters to me,” Lester said, sounding almost fierce in his conviction.

Becker looked into Lester’s eyes across the table. “You shouldn’t have kept it from me.”

Lester had the grace to look chagrined. “I’m sorry. I knew it would upset you.”

“I would rather have heard it from you than have it sprung on me like that.”

“I’m sorry,” he said again. “I thought... I don’t know what I thought. But it’s okay, isn’t it? Nothing happened.”

“No, it isn’t okay,” Becker said sharply. “They don’t understand. No one does. The anomalies aren’t a game; it’s not some carefree romp into another time, a nice afternoon outing to look at some dinosaurs.”

“Ms Stern assured me that they took their venture very seriously. They were quite safe.”

“Anomalies are never safe! Do you think Danny was just fooling around and suddenly couldn’t get home? Do you think I didn’t take every precaution I could think of when I let Sarah come on that rescue mission? It didn’t matter, none of it! Sarah trusted me and she died fucking screaming.” Becker squeezed his eyes shut against the memory of it. He would never be able to forget it, Sarah’s fear and the horrible cries torn from her before the creatures ripped her throat out. “I couldn’t even bring her body back for her family. You can’t understand so don’t fucking tell me they were safe.”

Lester was staring at him in shock. It was the first time Becker had ever actually spoken about Sarah, stuttered explanations and half-strangled apologies aside.

“I won’t let it happen again. I won’t lose anyone, not someone I care about and not even these stupid bloody Americans.”

Without saying a word, Lester got up and pulled his chair over next to Becker. Lester simply sat beside him, running his fingertips up and down the back of Becker’s neck, lightly and carefully, and then started moving his hand in circles on Becker’s back. Becker felt guilt creeping in for the way he had shouted. He was sorry for having said Lester couldn’t understand, even if it was true.

“Come to bed,” Lester said, kissing Becker’s neck just beyond the edge of his collar.

That seemed as good a suggestion as any so Becker got up from the table. They prepared for bed, manoeuvring around each other with less ease than usual, given the size of the bathroom.

Becker stretched out on his back beneath the duvet while Lester switched the light off and got in beside him. Normally Lester liked to read before bed, unless he was particularly tired or tense, but Becker suspected he was forgoing it this time out of concern for Becker.

He stared up at the ceiling and tried to clear his mind, willing himself to sleep. He had nearly resorted to counting sheep when Lester broke the silence.

“Stop brooding, it isn’t good for you.”

“I’m not brooding.”

“Oh?” Lester rolled onto his elbow and traced a hand over Becker’s face. “What do you call it, then? You’ll ruin your complexion.”

Becker took a breath and made an effort to relax, smoothing out his expression. He grabbed Lester’s hand and gripped it to his chest. “I can’t sleep. Please, will you just...”

Lester didn’t say anything, just kissed him, tasting minty like his toothpaste, and Becker stopped thinking. There was only the roll and press of their bodies beneath the duvet, Lester’s mouth and hands on Becker’s skin. It was slower and more tender than Becker usually preferred but it was exactly what he needed. His release took him almost unaware, gasping into Lester’s clavicle and leaving shallow scratches all down Lester’s back.

He felt better after and dropped easily into sleep, with Lester curled around him and breathing evenly into the back of his neck.

-

The next morning after breakfast, Becker set up a Skype call on his laptop to speak to Jess. Though it had only been a few days, it was good to see her cheerful, friendly face. She gave Becker a brief update on the situation at the ARC before pleading for details about their trip.

“I wish I could have come along,” she said plaintively. “I’ve never been to America; I’m sure it must be more exciting than staying here.”

“I don’t know about that,” Becker said, glancing up as Lester went to open the door.

Connor pushed his way through, leaning over Becker’s shoulder at the computer screen. “Oh, hi, Jess! Is Abby there?”

“She’s in the menagerie and she said to tell you nothing at all interesting has happened since the last time you spoke.”

“Don’t you have somewhere to be?” Lester said, looking sternly at Connor.

“Right,” Connor said, straightening up guiltily. “I came by to talk to you.”

Becker redirected his attention to Jess. “So that’s how it is here,” he said ruefully.

Jess was grinning. “Same as always?”

“Same as always,” he confirmed.

“Do you know why I think Lester brought you rather than anyone else? Aside from the obvious, I mean.”

“Because I serve the dual purpose of protecting him from both the creatures and the Americans?”

“Because you’re probably the only person in the world who will be able to get him home without him having suffered a nervous breakdown.”

“Sometimes I wonder if even I can pull that off.” Becker turned away from the screen for a moment to watch Lester and Connor, Connor speaking quickly while Lester crossed his arms in front of his chest. “Sorry, Jess, I’ve got to run. Connor looks like he has no idea that he’s about to be murdered.” Becker ended the connection to the sound of Jess’ laughter.

“Hey, Connor,” Becker cut in, standing up and placing himself between the other two men. “Shouldn’t you be heading back to the lab?”

“I am,” Connor protested. “That’s what I’ve been saying, but I’m trying to explain to Lester that the whole thing’s no good, I’ve got to--”

Becker gripped his arm and dragged him towards the door. “Great, fine, but you’d best be on your way, yeah?” In a lower voice, he added, “Come on, Connor, you know better than to start making excuses to Lester. He’s stressed enough as is; no need to pile it on. He’ll only take it out on you.” _And me,_ Becker thought. _Mostly on me._

“I know, sorry,” Connor said and stepped back into the corridor. “I just don’t want him to be expecting… Oh, never mind. See you later?”

“See you later,” Becker said, closing the door and pressing his back against it. One crisis averted, at least. He wondered if he could make it out of the hotel at least before the next one.


	2. Chapter 2

Before the anomaly opened, Lester and Becker had another meeting scheduled with Ms Stern, after which Becker was planning on picking up Connor, his equipment, and a couple of the people he had been working with. They were meeting Schuster and his team at the anomaly site. He did a last minute check to ensure the EMDs were charged and casually asked Lester, “Will you be staying with Ms Stern while we deal with the anomaly?”

“Why on earth would I do that? I will be supervising the incident.”

“But--”

“But nothing, Becker. I am here to offer assistance so that’s what I will do. I am still your superior; please don’t make me give you an order.”

“Yes, sir,” Becker said glumly, slipping back into the respectful address without being fully aware he was doing it. Lester at the anomaly site was a factor he hadn’t planned for but, honestly, he probably should have.

Before they left their room, Lester removed a familiar looking case from his suitcase.

“James,” Becker said, wanting to hear Lester explain even if he was sure he knew what Lester would say. “What is that?”

“An EMD, of course.” ‘ _Idiot’_ was the unspoken addendum.

Becker made himself count to five. “And why do you have an EMD?”

“You didn’t think you had the only ones, did you? As if I would go on a shout unprotected.”

“But I’m your protection; it’s what I’m here for.”

Lester gave Becker a look that would have shriveled a cactus before marching through the door without another word.

Becker sighed. He had a terrible feeling that things were going to get out of hand. But then, he really shouldn’t have been surprised by any of this. When had he ever been able to control Lester?

-

The football field was part of an athletic complex on the far southern edge of campus, bordering some farmland. They parked the car in a grass lot next to the baseball stadium and unloaded Connor’s equipment before trooping off to the field.

Schuster met them on the way. “I guess you found it okay.”

Becker nodded back to one of the engineers. “With some help.”

A gust of wind blew, bringing with it an unpleasant stench. Connor wrinkled his nose. “Do you smell that? What is it?”

Lester gestured into the distance, an expression of distaste on his face. “I believe it’s the farm.”

“Why would they build their athletic facilities by a farm? That’s just… wrong.”

“Welcome to the Midwest,” Schuster said cheerfully, quickening his pace. “You get used to the smell.”

“I highly doubt that,” Lester muttered, too quietly for anyone but Becker to hear.

Becker smiled to himself and kept walking.

The smell actually worsened when they reached the football field, as it was separated from the farm by only a road. Becker could see horses grazing by the fence and thought that at the very least, the university had some character.

Schuster had clearly informed his team that they were to take instruction from Becker, which Becker greatly appreciated. He directed them into position, covering the area where the anomaly would appear. That was the easy part.

The hard part was getting Lester out of the way. When Becker attempted to encourage him to stay back, Lester merely ignored him. A second attempt garnered a dirty look and a third, more forceful try only resulted in Lester saying something snarky and mildly degrading while he positioned himself near Connor and the makeshift anomaly locking device. Connor sniggered and Becker decided to salvage what was left of his dignity and leave Lester be.

Becker took his own place, keeping his EMD close to hand for when the anomaly appeared. The police officers were all standing warily, armed with tasers and, thankfully, rifles, while the animal handlers stayed farther back. Schuster had told him that they generally didn’t use tranquilisers during the initial stages of an incursion because it was too risky to determine proper doses while potentially dangerous creatures were coming at them, not to mention the fact that a tranquiliser dart wouldn’t bring anything down immediately. The animal experts would, however, do their best to calculate the doses in case there was need - and opportunity - for tranqs later. Becker was perfectly content to follow Schuster’s lead on that count.

He knew from experience that it was probably too much to hope for that no creatures would come through, but he prayed for something small and maybe even docile. He’d like to be able to tell Abby that he had managed not to kill anything.

And, of course, he desperately wanted to survive this trip without a single person getting hurt.

“I want you all to use your best judgment,” Becker announced. “If you can keep the creatures alive, great, but I don’t want any of you putting yourselves or others at risk trying to stun them. You have guns. Your lives are more important than theirs so shoot them if you have to.” Becker could practically feel Abby’s disapproval all the way from London but this was his call.

There was a murmur of ‘Yes, sir’s as everyone chorused their agreement.

It didn’t take long for the anomaly to begin to flicker into place. Becker kept his focus on the anomaly as Connor’s device made some dubious noises in the background. “No good?” he called back.

“It’s what I was afraid would happen,” Connor replied and then started thinking out loud.

To Becker, it was mostly incomprehensible, so he simply tuned it out. He rolled his shoulders back and shifted his stance, impatiently wishing the creatures would just get on with it. The anomalies were basically a magnet that usually proved too strong to resist.

Ten more minutes passed with nothing. The hot afternoon sun was beating down on Becker’s head and sweat trickled between his shoulder blades, running down his back.

“Maybe nothing will come through this time,” one of the police officers said, a young woman with short blonde hair.

Becker bit his lip and repressed the urge to curse her for jinxing them.

And sure enough, only moments later Becker saw a snout poking through. “We’ve got a visitor,” he said and took aim. “Everyone hold your fire, I’ve got it.”

The creature came through the anomaly with a leap, pausing as it stared around at them, jaws open to reveal its large, sharp teeth. It reminded Becker of a large, thick-bodied dog and was perhaps slightly smaller than a wolf. It turned its head back towards the anomaly and made a growling sound but as it started to crouch, as if preparing to launch itself at them, Becker shot at it, firing multiple bursts of his EMD until the creature fell to the ground.

So much for something small and docile.

Becker nudged the body with his toe. “What the hell is it?”

“Hyaenodon,” Connor said at once. “Like at Jenny’s wedding? The smaller ones were probably pack hunters, so you can expect--”

“There’s more of them!” Schuster called.

“Shit,” Becker swore, moving back to put more space between himself and the anomaly. “Schuster and…” Regretfully, Becker forced himself to continue, “Lester, up front with me. The rest of you, guns out, back us up.” If they didn’t get overwhelmed, perhaps the three EMDs would be enough.

Three of the creatures came through one after the other, forming a line in front of the anomaly and sniffing the air, baring their teeth. For a moment Becker thought perhaps this would be easy, shoot them before they moved, but as he opened fire on one hyaenodon, the other two moved, springing out of the way and avoiding the other EMDs.

The creature Becker had targeted collapsed but an additional two had jumped through the anomaly, bringing the current total to four still conscious. The first two had bounded forward, quick and agile, converging on the young police officer who had spoken earlier. Becker ran towards her, shooting as he went, the familiar sound of the EMDs combining with rifle fire in his ears.

Even with two snarling prehistoric creatures marking her as their prey, the woman kept her ground and stayed calm, aiming her gun and killing one hyaenodon as the other succumbed to Becker’s EMD. “Okay?” he asked her, keeping his EMD steady and taking stock.

She simply nodded and said, “Perfect,” a quirked half-smile on her face.

Becker really had underestimated these people.

He was already moving away from her, having located Schuster and one of the remaining creatures when someone shouted, “Becker!” and Becker turned in time to see a large hyaenodon just metres away from him.

It launched itself at him, claws outstretched and catching Becker’s arm, and Becker heard an EMD discharge just as he fired off his own, straight into the animal’s chest. He stumbled back but the hyaenodon’s forward momentum led it crashing into Becker and he ended up on his back with the unconscious creature on top of him. His breath left his body in a painful _whoosh_ and he gasped for air, lying still for a moment before he was able to roll the thing off him.

Becker’s eyes met Lester’s, who was standing there with his EMD raised, answering the question as to who had shot the hyaenodon from behind. As much as he hadn’t wanted Lester anywhere near this anomaly, Becker had to admit that it was possibly the hottest thing he’d ever seen. Too bad it was going to be ages before he got a chance to work off all the excess adrenaline in his system.

“All clear,” he heard Schuster shouting and he let his head fall back on the ground.

Lester stepped over to him, holding his hand out. “You’re not hurt?”

“No, just a bit winded,” Becker said and accepted the hand up, forcing himself to take deeper breaths in spite of the uncomfortable knot in the pit of his stomach. “Thanks for the assist.”

“Looks like I was the one doing the protecting, after all.”

“I wouldn’t go that far.” Becker reached his hands out, wanting to check Lester over himself, but pulled back at the last instant. He doubted Lester would appreciate it. He kept his voice as even and casual as he could. “Are you all right? James?”

“I’m fine, don’t fuss,” Lester said, irritation colouring his words, but his green-grey eyes were only reassuring. “There isn’t a scratch on me.”

Despite Lester’s reply, Becker swept a careful glance over his body, searching for any hint of damage, but Lester appeared to have been truthful. His tie was askew and his hair was a bit windswept but he looked unharmed.

“Don’t you have work to do? There seem to be a lot of creatures lying about that need to find themselves back on the right end of that anomaly. I’m sure the Americans would appreciate your assistance.”

“All right, darling, I’m going. Don’t get your pants in a twist.”

Lester’s gaze darted to the side as he scowled. “Don’t call me that in front of the Americans,” he said and shoved his EMD at Becker before moving away.

“No one’s listening,” Becker muttered, uselessly, as Lester was no longer paying him any mind. He had long since grown accustomed to Lester’s care for his reputation but he would be lying if he claimed not to mind that Lester evidently still considered his relationship with Becker something best kept hidden from anyone he wanted to impress.

He found Schuster and was about to ask where he would be most useful, but Schuster beat him to it. “Captain Becker, you’re bleeding.”

Becker glanced down at himself, belatedly realising that yes, in fact, he was bleeding. There was a line of gashes across his upper arm, matching the hyaenodon’s claws, deep enough that it was probably going to start hurting a little once the last of the adrenaline wore off. “I don’t think it’s too bad.”

Lester, apparently having heard, walked over and touched Becker’s arm, frowning.“Let me be the judge of that. Is there somewhere we can go to get Captain Becker cleaned up?”

Schuster had already pulled out a key ring and tossed two of the keys to Lester. “One of these will open Bielfeldt, down the sidewalk that way,” he said as he pointed. A big red brick building was just visible in the distance. “The other key’s for the training room, I don’t think they keep it fully stocked in the summer but it should have the basics. Go on; we can take care of things while you’re gone.”

“Thank you. Come along, Captain.”

Becker hurried after in Lester’s wake, taking a few long strides to catch up. “This isn’t necessary. I would’ve kept until we finished here.”

“Pardon me for wanting to dress your wounds.”

“Well, you’ll have to forgive me for not thinking you wanted anyone to see us alone together.”

Lester glanced sideways at Becker. “What is that supposed to mean?”

“Exactly what I said.”

“Is this because… Oh, Hils. You are terribly sensitive sometimes, aren’t you?”

Becker refused to look at him or to dignify that with a response. Like hell he was sensitive.

“Don’t sulk,” Lester said, briefly squeezing Becker’s shoulder as they walked. “It’s nothing to do with you in particular; though I’d rather keep my relationships off the table I’d be deluding myself if I thought no one knows. While I wouldn’t go so far as to say we’re public knowledge, we’re far from a secret any more.”

“Then why…”

“I need the Americans to respect me, not snigger over my lover calling me ridiculous pet names and fussing like I’m a child.”

To his great reluctance, Becker felt a smile creep onto his face. “I suppose I can see your point.”

“I’m so glad,” Lester said wryly as they reached the glass doors of the Bielfeldt Administration Building. He turned the key in the lock and strode inside, coming to a stop in a large lounge. Opposite them were another set of doors leading outside while corridors stretched on either side.

Turning to his left in what was probably an arbitrary decision, Lester started off down one of the corridors, again leaving Becker to follow him. “Ah,” he said, as they reached a door identified as the athletic training room. He unlocked it and stepped inside, finding a light switch next to the door.

The room didn’t seem to have been used in a while, the countertops bare and the whole place smelling faintly of dust. Becker took a seat on an exam table and left Lester to explore the cabinets. As Schuster had informed them, it wasn’t well-stocked, but Lester triumphantly retrieved some antibiotic ointment, gauze, and butterfly bandages.

“There’s a sink in the corner,” Lester informed him, which Becker took as his cue to move.

Becker removed his body armour and took his shirt off, wincing as the sleeve scraped against the scratches.

While Lester started to clean them, he said, “I’m sorry I didn’t notice. I don’t know what I was thinking.”

“It doesn’t matter. It’s nothing serious.”

“I think you might need stitches.”

“It’s fine,” Becker insisted, though he privately thought Lester was likely right. He just didn’t want to have to see a doctor.

Lester very gently pulled the edges of the biggest laceration closed and eyed it doubtfully. “It might be all right.”

“Look, it’s pretty much closed. It’s not like I care if it scars.”

“It was fairly deep.”

“James, just put the butterfly bandages on. It will be fine.”

Although Becker had half-expected Lester to continue to argue, he merely dressed the wound, a pinched and unhappy expression on his face. “There,” he said when he’d finished.

“It’s only a scratch,” Becker said carefully, watching Lester put the supplies back. He wished he knew what Lester was thinking.

“Put your shirt back on,” Lester said, the cabinet door closing with a harsh _bang._

They exited the room and locked it, needing to slam the door to get it to actually lock. The walk back to Schuster and the others passed in silence.

-

“Please don’t go to bed angry at me,” Becker said, hours later, after Lester had turned the lights off.

“I’m not angry at you,” Lester said but he was looking up at the ceiling.

“Really? Because you’ve barely spoken to me since the anomaly.” It had made the dinner they’d shared with Schuster and his team more than a little awkward, especially as Becker had got the impression that Schuster suspected they were sleeping together.

“I thought we were past the stage of feeling like we need to constantly speak.”

“You know this is different. Don’t pull that shit with me. I can tell when you’re upset.”

Lester finally rolled over so he was facing Becker, propping himself up on his elbow. “How many times are we going to do this? How long is it going to take for you to realise that I hate it when you act like it’s okay for you to get hurt?”

No more games. That was good, at least. “How long is it going to take for you to realise that I’m going to get hurt and it’s no big deal?” Becker threw back at him. “It’s what happens when you do what I do. I mean, honestly, it was only a few scratches. You’ve seen me with far worse than that.” Probably it was cruel to remind Lester of that, but Becker wasn’t exactly in the mood to care.

“No, don’t you dare make this about me. You know exactly what I mean. This isn’t about you getting roughed up; it’s about your sodding cavalier attitude. It’s about you not caring what happens to you, like you aren’t worth it.”

“I’m--”

“I’m not an idiot. I know everything comes back to your father but whatever he did to you, you are worth something to me,” Lester said, his voice cracking a little. He gazed at Becker for a moment, his eyes shining in the darkness, before he turned over and showed Becker his back, shoving himself down into the duvet until only the top of his head was visible.

Becker lay there, not sure if he was irritated or touched or what. Eventually he said, “And what about you? Can’t I be scared for you when you don’t listen to me, when you put yourself in danger even though I beg you not to? You pay me to keep the team safe but then you won’t let me do it.”

Lester didn’t say anything but Becker hadn’t expected him to. He supposed this was simply going to remain one of those things they would never see eye-to-eye on, an unresolved mass of feelings hanging between them.

It didn’t mean he had to like it.

-

_He moves through the ARC, sighting down his EMD, but there’s nothing. He rounds a corner and hears a noise, points his EMD low but it’s Jess. Jess with splotches of something red on her face and her clothes that can only be blood and Becker realises she’s saying something, mouth forming the same words over and over. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry.”_

_Becker stares at her while a cold sense of dread overcomes him. He feels frozen in place, like his muscles have seized, but there is an inexorable pull downwards, towards what Jess is cradling in her lap. But Becker knows what he’ll find, knows what he’ll see, and he doesn’t want to face it._ Don’t look down, don’t look down, don’t--

When Becker jerked awake he felt like he was choking, like there wasn’t enough air getting to his lungs, and he took deep, gasping breaths. He was so hot, he was sweating, and he kicked the blankets off.

Lester’s hand was rubbing his chest. “All right?” he asked, sleep-rough.

_Don’t look down, don’t look--_

The fact that Lester was there, warm and sleepy and whole and not... not... It made Becker want to crush Lester to himself, hold him fiercely and not let go, kiss his mouth and feel him still breathing.

But it had only been a nightmare and Becker wasn’t a child any more. He needed to not be stupid about it and he needed Lester not to know. “Yes. Yes, I’m all right.” The words were a struggle, his mouth was so dry.

“Bad dream?”

Lester seemed more awake with every second that passed and that stirred Becker into action. He gently pushed Lester away and sat up. “I’m sorry I woke you. Go back to sleep, okay? I’m just going to get some water, I’ll be back in a minute.” It was hard to make himself leave but he’d resolved to be an adult about this. He could feel Lester’s eyes on him as he walked into the bathroom.

Switching on the light and closing the door behind him, Becker went to the sink and splashed cold water on his face. God damn it. He hadn’t had a nightmare like that in months.

For a while, he had had them all the time, variations of the same theme. Lester dead in the ARC, ripped apart by future predators. Sometimes he was dead before Becker got there, sometimes he was killed before Becker’s eyes, sometimes the predators got to him in the medical bay... It didn’t matter. He always died. Becker was always too late, too slow, not good enough, and he always awoke with the same sick, overwhelming sense of loss.

He felt a stab of guilt, realising that maybe that was how Lester felt all the time, constantly patching him up and listening to him say over and over that it didn’t matter. Listening to him apologise again and again for doing something dangerous and thoughtless. He wished that he could tell Lester he would change without it being a lie. He wished he could change, for Lester, and wondered what sort of person it made him that he couldn’t.

Becker leaned against the counter, white-knuckled, and looked at himself in the mirror. The hair above his forehead was damp with sweat and there was a ghostly pallor to his skin. “You fucking idiot,” he muttered to himself. “A nightmare, that’s all it was. Nothing happened.”

_I won’t ever let anything happen to him._

Which, of course, was a sentiment that would absolutely appall Lester, but that was neither here nor there.

When Becker crept back into bed, Lester was sleeping again, his breathing slow and even. Becker draped his arm over Lester’s body and tugged him in tight against his chest, Lester melting into him easily. “I’ll always save you,” Becker whispered. “Whether you want me to or not.”

-

Becker spent most of the following day bored silly. Connor was working on getting the anomaly locking device operational while Lester spent much of the day in administrative meetings with Ms Stern and other university officials. Becker was thankfully able to bow out of most of that but aside from a couple of hours spent with Schuster and his team, discussing containment techniques and the like, he didn’t have much to occupy his time.

Before meeting with Schuster he spoke with Jess again, but they had only been talking a few minutes when the anomaly alert went off and she was forced to cut it short. Becker felt a pang as he closed his laptop, the alarm echoing in his ears. He trusted them to be safe but he detested the idea of not being there with them.

He went for a long run in the afternoon, trying to clear his head of the lingering remnants from his bad night. He circled around the eastern edge of campus and into the town of Urbana whereas the previous day he had gone into Champaign. It was all fairly suburban, with the large university campus sprawling through the two cities, and it seemed a nice enough place to live.

The clouds broke while Becker was running and he finished in the rain, water dripping down his face and feeling blessedly cool after the cloying humidity of the day. Lester was in their room when Becker came back, probably having just arrived, and Becker took great pleasure in greeting him while drenched to the skin.

Lester, needless to say, was far less amused.

-

The second trip to the anomaly site went much more smoothly than the first. Becker, Schuster, and the team of police officers ringed the anomaly while Connor and a couple of the engineers he had been working with set up the anomaly locking device with Lester observing. But this time, the anomaly flickered open and then moments later, Connor locked it with a small whoop of triumph.

Schuster stepped closer to the anomaly, staring at it with disbelief. “That’s it, then? It’s locked?”

“Completely locked,” Connor said, checking the device. “Nothing can get through unless we open it. Do you want to see?”

Schuster shrugged and indulged his curiosity, listening carefully as Connor launched into a basic explanation for him, which he then segued into a more detailed account of how to handle the device from then on for the benefit of the engineers.

Lester beckoned Becker aside. “Lieutenant Schuster knows to keep a watch on the anomaly even while it’s locked?”

“Yes, I’ll tell him.”

“Good. I need to meet with Ms Stern again but you’re welcome to spend the time however you choose.”

“I’ll go with you,” Becker offered. “I don’t mind.”

“Okay,” Lester said, nodding, the faint trace of a smile around his mouth.

Becker supposed he was probably coming across as clingy but decided he didn’t care.

-

Their flight back to London wasn’t until tomorrow, so following their meeting with Ms Stern (who was extremely gracious and complimentary about the work they had done), they had the rest of the day to themselves. Connor was off being a nerd with his new American friends and Becker and Lester decided to take the opportunity to see some more of the university campus.

They were currently walking through what Becker understood to be the heart of campus, the quad, which was a large open area surrounded by a grouping of buildings. Even in summer, there were students milling about, hurrying along the pavement to summer classes, laughing together, or stretched out upon the grass with books and iPods. There was even a cluster of boys tossing a Frisbee back and forth between them. Becker could only imagine how busy the area was during the school year.

As they strolled, Becker felt uncomfortably as though everyone was staring at him. He supposed it was the combats - not exactly a common sight for a university campus. Lester seemed to sense his discomfort and put an arm around his waist.

“You stand out a bit, I’m afraid, Hils.”

“I’d noticed. Maybe I should’ve changed first.”

“I don’t think that’s the only reason they’re staring, love,” Lester said with an amused chuckle.

And then Becker started to take note of the _way_ people were staring (or, to be more accurate, the way they were looking, glancing away, and looking again). His face felt hot. “Oh, Christ. Bloody students and their hormones.”

A frightening thought occurred to him. A lot of the videos people took of the anomalies ended up on Youtube, which meant anyone could watch them. Americans included. There were actual _websites_ devoted to the ARC team _._ Becker felt a little bit like he wanted to crawl behind a rock and never come back out. Connor and Jess and, well, everyone, really, might find it hilarious that Becker had become something of a reluctant celebrity, but Becker really, really didn’t. The others could keep their “fans” and they could have his, too.

Lester spread his fingers out over Becker’s hip, casually and familiarly. “Perhaps they’ll start to get the idea now.”

Becker took a look at Lester’s face, at the blatant possessiveness in his eyes. At least the Youtube thing hadn’t occurred to Lester yet, because the teasing would be merciless. “Why, James, is that why you put your arm around me? Broadcasting your claim?”

Lester turned his face completely away from Becker, mumbling, “It’s rude to stare.”

It was vaguely demeaning, as if Lester were treating him like property, but Becker couldn’t deny it was also gratifying, in a way. He liked feeling as though he belonged to Lester. “Don’t worry, sweetie, none of them get to see me naked.”

That comment was simply ignored because apparently Lester was sulking.

So Becker stopped where he was, in the middle of the pavement, and drew Lester in. He cupped Lester’s neck in his hands and rubbed his thumbs over Lester’s skin. “None of them get to do what I’ll let you do to me back at the hotel, either.”

“What would that be?”

Becker leaned his forehead against Lester’s and whispered, “Whatever you want to do, gorgeous, but I was imagining something along the lines of your cock and my arse.”

To Becker’s surprise, Lester gave him a languid kiss, fingers curling around the back of Becker’s head, sucking at Becker’s bottom lip. Then he quite abruptly pulled back and began walking again, leaving Becker to hurry to catch up.

“They’re really staring now,” Becker said, feeling an absurd desire to laugh. Somehow he was getting the impression that Lester’s behaviour was very deliberate and had an awful lot to do with Becker having let on that he possibly was just a little bit sensitive. A tiny, minuscule bit and if he was, it was definitely Lester’s fault.

“Let them,” Lester said with a sniff, his head held high. “Most likely they’re trying to figure out if you actually are… What is it they call you on the internet? Captain Pretty?”

Becker’s shoulders slumped. “Among other things.” He was sure Connor had been the one to start the “Action Man” trend and he suspected the girls had had a hand in the ones that focused on his arse.

“Well,” Lester said and slung his arm back around Becker. “I’m sure they’re all jealous that a man who looks like he might be Captain Pretty is taken.”

“Even when you try to be reassuring, you’re really not,” Becker said, but he was smiling a little. Maybe he and Lester weren’t perfect, but Becker thought they would do.

**_End_ **


End file.
